Sunday, October 14, 2007

The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction contest

I came across this while surfing. I've heard about this contest before--there's usually something on the news about the winning entry. I read through every one of these, and actually laughed out loud on many of them. Here's my favorite:

Ruthanne felt as though she was frozen in time, staring into Steve's eyes, deep turquoise pools of Tidy-Bowl blue, reflecting back the deep passionate love that Ruthanne felt in her heart because Steve certainly didn't feel anything, being in a coma as he was, so what Ruthanne had reflected back to herself was what she herself felt, bouncing off Steve's eyes, because there was absolutely zip going on behind those eyes.

Linda Morgan
Manassas, VA

"Pools of Tidy-Bowl blue!" Brilliant! Here is the complete list. It'll make you laugh, I guarantee.

It reminds me of several years ago, when Cousin Shane and Niece Jen and I did our own little Bad Poetry contest. I wish I still had those, but they are long gone. All I can remember is that Shane's poem (I believe we called them pomes, though) was titled "I Am Pea," and there was something about a lone pea rattling around a plate. Ha ha! Very existentialist. Uh-oh, I feel a bout of Bad Poetry coming on....

Later that morning

I got up really early this morning, so I thought I'd get all cozy on the couch, turn on the TV, and snooze. I made the mistake of turning on American Movie Classics, which just happened to be showing "Hoosiers," which is the best sports movie ever, in my opinion. (I understand that I'm a little biased, though.) I don't know how many times I've seen it, but I never tire of it (even though I know what happens at the end), and it never fails to make me cry like a child. When they're getting ready to go out for the big game, and they all clasp hands, and Coach Dale says quietly, "I love you guys." Aww, man! Gets me every time. Part of it is that I know very well how accurate the movie is as far as "Hoosier Hysteria." It really is that crazy. I found a nice writeup on the movie and the real team it was inspired by, the Milan Indians. It's worth a read if you love hoops and especially, hoops movies.

That afternoon

If you take a look at my favorite sites to the left, you'll see that I've added Dr. Will Miller. I wrote about this a while back, and here is Dr. Will's take on it. This is why I love Dr. Will!

On the Couch: Paris & Narcissistic Delusions

October 1st, 2007

Monday, Lafayette, Indiana

Paris Hilton made an appearance on the David Letterman Show Friday night and predictably he comedically peppered her with questions about going to jail. After tolerating it for a few minutes she began to get edgy and pushed him to change the subject. She said she was there not to talk about going to jail but about her new line of perfume and whatever. Huh?

It was revealing that Paris seems somewhat unaware of why she is famous and why she gets to be a guest on television show. It seems that she does not grasp that she is famous principally because she is a paparazzi icon. She is a young woman living a fantasy life whose unearned wealth, jet set partying, and nightlife antics are a curiosity to idle American citizens. It’s exactly because she went to jail that she has sustained media attention.

Signs that you are clueless

- Although your hearing is perfect, your first response to every question is "what?"

- You have never read a newspaper

- Most of the time you feel bored

- You life’s dream is to be on Project Runway, but not as a designer

- You can name every hot designer purse but cannot make change

- You don’t know how to vote

- Regardless of the occasion you always wear high heels

- You were "let go" by Burger King

- At least once a month you run out of gas

- You cannot name which states are next to yours

I commented about this on Dr. Will's site, and got a comment back:

Thanks for the comment - and YES that is a great observation - her swinging leg was hilarious! Hope you are enjoying the updates. Pass it on.

Dr. Will Miller
Awesome! Dr. Will said I had a "great observation!" I just love him.
That evening

It was a nice day today, but the weather is getting cool enough that it was time to switch out my summer/winter clothes. It's actually kind of fun to do that, because I bring up stuff from the basement (and take summer stuff down there) and I usually end up saying, "Oh, I forgot about that! I miss that sweater." I'm sure that in the spring, I'll bring up the summer stuff and say, "Oh, I love that tank top!"

I had a nice call today from our friends Kim and Steve in California. They'd spent the weekend in Monterey, and went to the Aquarium. Steve is a science teacher, and he does a lot of work with his students at the Aquarium. We've been there, and it's an excellent one. My keychain sports a nifty penguin keychain from the Aquarium, a present from Kim and Steve. I had to laugh, because I believe that was the keychain that made it official: I have more keychains on my keychain than I have keys! Car key, house key--what else do I need to carry around with me? What am I, a custodian?

I'm feeling the urge for a Beth's Music Moment, but I've written so much already today. I should probably save it for tomorrow. I haven't decided yet who I'll write about, but I have a couple of bands in mind.

A while back, I made Texas Barbecue Brisket, with a homemade barbecue sauce. I had a bunch of sauce left over, so today I'm doing a chuck roast with that sauce. It smells so good, I can hardly stand it. I will pull the roast out of the crockpot and shred it, then put it back in the crockpot with the sauce, and voilĂ --shredded barbecue sammitches! Yummy-yum.


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