Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
Don't you just love it when you're sitting in a meeting, and your manager brings up an issue for the entire group, although everyone knows it's targeted at only a few individuals--or perhaps only one? First of all, I've wished for years that various managers I've had would address issues with individuals, rather than lumping us all into the same group. In a previous job, we were all told that we needed to watch our late starts and cut down on our tardiness. Tardiness? Me? I'm never late to work barring bad weather or unforeseen disaster, and in fact I tend to get there 15 minutes or so early. It's always rankled me to be chided, no matter how gently, for an infraction which I haven't committed.
Secondly, I've also noticed that the person or persons who DO commit the infractions invariably don't "get it" that they are the ones responsible! Sometimes to the point of absurdity. An issue a few years ago occurred with one person who took frequent and lengthy breaks, to the point where they spent about three hours a day out of the department. Several of us complained about it--there was work to be done, by God!--and it was addressed at a departmental meeting. We were ALL reminded about our breaks, although only one person was abusing the privilege. This person actually spoke up and reminded US that our breaks and lunches start when we leave the department, not when we get to the break room. We were floored, and there was a stunned silence before we moved on to the next topic. We still laugh about it.
Cluelessness, indeed. We encounter so many people who are so completely unaware of their own behaviors that they actually believe they are totally innocent in such matters, and often begin to accuse others of the same behavior. I'm not sure if that's considered delusional or not, but it seems pretty thick-skulled at the very least. From the person in the grocery store who stops in the middle of the aisle to chat, to the person who leaves their cell phone on in a movie theater or courtroom, to the coworker who just doesn't get that their excessive breaks are cheating their coworkers AND their company...it's a complete lack of self-awareness at best, or a feeling of "that doesn't apply to ME" at the worst.
Awareness of the self and of the world around you is a great state to be in. Give it a try! Not only can you learn more about yourself, your motivations, and your own personal bugaboos, you can figure out areas you need to work on, and ways to improve your outlook, how others perceive you, and day-to-day interactions. Be aware of the kind of people you like to be around--they are probably upbeat, positive, ready with a word of praise or with a gentle touch if criticism is needed, smiling, kind, drama-free...do you try to emulate those qualities, or do you project the opposite to those you encounter? Something as simple as being aware and thinking about the behavior of people who others like to be around can lead you to insights about your own behavior. Are people drawn to you, or when they see you coming, do they get that deer-in-the-headlights look? How do you want to be perceived? A little self-awareness can go a long way in changing things.